David was a millionaire.

He was on his second business, but also his second marriage. He succeeded in his first business but failed in his first marriage. At 54 years old he was in better shape than me. Top of his class in school and everything he touched turned into gold.

“Josh, I can fix EVERTYHING. It is what I do. I see a problem and I find a solution. Why can’t I fix my marriage? What is wrong with me?”

I told him that nothing was “wrong” with him, he was just acting through pride. As men, we are taught to figure out things ourselves.

It is in our identity to be a man who can make his own way in the world. However, sometimes pride can blind us to the truth.

Pride is the emotion that has you look down on people. You need to come down to see things from the right perspective.

I asked David a question that shifted his perspective. “If your employees come to you with problems, do you think any less of them? Would you rather have them swallow their pride and get it right or go at it on their own and make a costly mistake?”

That is all I had to say. He knew he was making a costly mistake each and every day he didn’t seek help in his marriage.

He told me that his pride is what cost him his first marriage. He didn’t want to make the same mistake in his second.

“All men make mistakes, but a good man yields when he knows his course is wrong and repairs the evil. The only crime is pride.”
― Sophocles, Antigone

David trusted that there were some answers he didn’t know. He let go of his ego and decided to trust my process. For many men like David and yourself, you are on a downward escalator in your marriage.

Each and every day you don’t take the right steps forward, you are headed down toward separation, divorce, loneliness, and failure.

This is a hard pill to swallow, but I need to call you out on it because your future self will thank me.